TheVoice

There are two voices in my head. They converse frequently and fall in uninvited. I can hear them both, relegating my voice to the deep and taking over my mind. When I close my eye, all I see is darkness. Every day, this body loses life and colour and there's nothing to do. I wonder when these days will end, if they'll ever end. I get my ass to work, to therapy. I encourage myself, but it never seems to be enough. When I try to search my soul, I find it void . My soul wanders when salvation will come. If at all, my pleas, heaven had heard; My tears, enough evidence of a lesson well learnt; My quivering lips, a confirmation of my quest for redemption; My shaky self, a sign of surrender; And my bended knees, a consideration for our agreement.

The smoke hovered above our heads, foggy like the cloud we existed  in; we were burning in our hell, so our soul can bear the heat in hell He banged his fists loudly on the armrest, and stroked my body a little harder; the ball had bounced back from the post, the boy in blue wasn't winning For a second she took over my sanity: "I was the lucky charm he had cast his lot on, I, who can't charm charm my way, nor seduce a stroke of luck" His voice sung me out of my slumber, It was only a soccer moment; my fears fled behind a smiley face, and my heart, once more hummed merry hymns   

you might think you made a new world or a new self, but your old self is always gonna be there, just below the surface. and if something happens, it will stick its head out and say hi. (Haruki Murakimi)